


Mythic (Disproportional)

by aphrodite_mine



Category: Picture This!
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-21
Updated: 2011-10-21
Packaged: 2018-04-27 12:09:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5048023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aphrodite_mine/pseuds/aphrodite_mine





	Mythic (Disproportional)

8.

The summer Cayenne’s brother gets shipped off to Iraq is the summer when she starts believing in all that spirit-curse-mumbo-jumbo. At least, that’s what Alexa thinks it is. For awhile.

Until Cayenne holds a séance and her voice gets deep and Alexa just starts praying for something totally not creepy to happen, and then Cayenne opens her eyes, and she’s crying, and Alexa takes it back, but apparently it’s too late because Cayenne leans forward and puts her head on Alexa’s lap and whispers “I’m sorry, Alexa. I know it scares you, but I just need something to believe in.”

Alexa knows what that’s like, so she wipes Cayenne’s eyes and pulls her up for a hug, but instead, Cayenne kisses her, feather-light, on the lips. And Alexa’s heart races, because it’s not creepy, not even weird.

That year they hold hands under the lunch table, while Cayenne tells Mandy about numerology. Alexa tries not to smile too wide when she traces the number eight knowing she’s really writing “eternity.”

9.

Mandy asks them later whose idea it was to start the band, and neither of them actually remembers. They just know that one day Cayenne guilt-tripped her mom into getting her a drum set and a week later Alexa got the electric guitar she wanted for her birthday and they set up in Cayenne’s basement and worked things out together, things like rhythm and bleeding fingertips forming calluses and reward kisses.

Eventually, Alexa got a few lessons from this guy she knew in science lab, and dyed her hair to go with her new-found knowledge. Cayenne just watched a lot of music videos and knows down to the exact day, hour, minute and second when the rhythm found her and started beating in her blood. She kept her hair the same, which Alexa said she preferred anyways.

No one really showed up for the first show aside from Mandy and their parents (camcorder in hand) and a few other Nottingham kids who are actually geekier than they are, but they don’t even have to exaggerate afterwards when they smile at one another and say “We _rocked_.”

10.

It registers to Alexa one day that Cayenne is a screamer. At least, that’s what boys in her class call girls who make noises during sex, the kind of whooping yells, the keening screams, the building sobs that Cayenne does; she overhears them talking during study hall.

The word, screamer, settles in her mind for a long minute and then she dismisses it. None of those girls could possibly utter a single sound as beautiful as when Cayenne whimpers “Alexa” while arching against her. None of those girls could mimic the wailing “Don’t stop, don’t stop don’t, stop” heaving from her perfect breasts, her perfect mouth. Those girls are screamers, Cayenne is something else.

Cayenne is a siren.

11.

Cayenne gives Alexa a sidelong glance. “Mandy looks happy, doesn’t she?”

Alexa considers this for a moment. “I guess so. I mean, sure. In a heterosexual kind of way.” She tucks her chin against Cayenne’s shoulder, leaning close.

“How long do you think she’ll last before she starts trying to set us up with his friends?”

“Assuming he has any left after that stunt, you mean?” Alexa turns away from Mandy’s glowing face and takes a nibble at Cayenne’s ear.

“Good point. I should Ouija anyways.” Cayenne is dead serious, but beginning to flush from Alexa’s attentions. “We do want warning, right?”

Alexa smiles. “Did you get a heads up that I’d want you out of this dress within a half hour?” She starts pulling the meshy green fabric up, bluffing that she’ll go for the goods right in the middle of the crowd.

Cayenne blushes and bats Alexa’s hand away. “Didn’t need the spirits for that. Let’s go to your place.”

12.

“It doesn’t make sense to take the drums with me,” Cayenne blurts out, sitting up suddenly in bed, her hand still on Alexa’s thigh. “You’ve seen the dorm rooms. No way that’s logical.”

Alexa stays quiet, barely moving against the pillow.

“And it’s not like I’ll have time to practice anyways. I’ve been thinking about rushing.” She examines her knees, pulling her fingers from Alexa’s skin to poke at her own. She continues talking without looking in Alexa’s direction, knowing what her face must look like. “I know we’ve always said that going Greek is totally worthless and fake, but I’m not going to know anyone, and the girls I met on the tour seemed really nice…” Her voice fades out.

Alexa can’t find the words to snap back. She feels like she’s on stage – everything is locking up inside of her.

Cayenne fills up the silence. “I’m going to have to make friends fast or else I’ll go crazy on the weekends.” She chances a glance at her girlfriend. They’ve graduated to the title now, hesitant, but surely. “I told you, Alexa, last week. My dad isn’t giving me the car, and its way too much trouble to find a ride down constantly.”

Alexa licks her lips. Turns her head. “Right. I remember.” She slides out of bed, groping the floor blindly for her clothes. She doesn’t want to make these last months worse. Doesn’t want to make them painful. If she could tell Cayenne without saying the words that she’s taking her guitar, her amp, that she’ll think of thin hips, of begging, keening, of cherry kisses every time she plays and every time she doesn’t – she would.

Instead, she pictures Cayenne wearing sorority t-shirts, taking shots from a line, kissing other girls – all with a glow that says _I’m not yours, I never was_ \- and Alexa just says “Later,” and closes the door behind her.


End file.
